Your present state is directly desired by God for your good. You must do nothing but resign yourself and bless the hand that seems to reject you. I say seems, because in reality the Father's hand never rejects, but it calls, embraces, caresses, and if it sometimes afflicts one, it is always a paternal hand. In times of darkness and aridity, rest assured that, even if the sky seems to be made of bronze, it is still serene in your soul.
It is true that you don't see this serenity in that state. You cannot and must not see it, because God desires it to be so, but you should believe that serenity is shining. He who takes the place of God down here is with you and reassuring you of this.
You complain and doubt your love of Jesus. But tell me, whoever was it that told you, you do not love our most sweet Savior? Ah, I know, you would like to love God as he deserves. But you know also that all this is not possible for us creatures. God commands us to love him not as much as he deserves, but love him in accordance with our limitations and therefore doesn’t ask us to do what we cannot. Well then, don’t you make every effort to do all of this?
And even if you don’t succeed, why do you complain, why do you worry? God understands very well, our intention, which is upright and holy before him. God knows well the reason why many good desires are not realized except after a great deal of work and some are never realized at all.
Before anything else, we should try to live in tranquility of spirit. Not because tranquility is the mother of Christian content, but because it is the daughter of love of God and the resignation of our own will. We can have occasion to practice this daily, because contradictions are never lacking, and when there is nothing that causes this, we form it ourselves.
Often place yourself in the presence of God, and offer him all your actions and suffering. I am not against your abstaining from complaining in your suffering, but if you do so, I would like you to do so with the Lord, with a childlike spirit, as a tender babe would with its mother.
From a letter addressed to a spiritual daughter by St. Pio of Pietrelcina.